Dottie beloved by all who knew her:
“Three weeks ago, I told Dottie that we would be together, forever, no matter what; and that I knew her body was failing her so just to tell me when she was done with this one.
When checking if she was a candidate for acupuncture to treat a possible slipped disc, we found severe arthritis in her front joints and X-Rays showed that the mammary cancer had spread to her lungs.
Even after two weeks on new medication, her mobility declined to the point she could no longer walk or stand on her own. It became apparent that treatments to get her walking again would likely not come before it became too difficult and painful to breathe. Even though it was a challenge to maneuver her at 70+lbs and the many nights of broken and restless sleep, I told her I would not give up on her. I just kept telling her I love her and we’d be together forever.
Last Sunday evening, Dottie told me she was done with this physical body. My heart broke but I said, “okay”.
We started Monday morning with usual breakfast and meds she had been on to prevent seizures. I wanted to keep up with our routine in case she changed her mind.
Darin came by just after breakfast. Then our amazing “sitter”, and then Jorge, her “boyfriend”, who has done wonderful work on the house improvements over the past 5 months - both of whom so kindly offered to come for support. I said, “We’ll be okay just us.”
Between visits, Dottie had a couple of goodbye calls but I left time to lay down outside together before getting in the car to see Dr. Palmquist by 2pm.
She still loved to eat and even though she had breakfast, second breakfast, freeze dried beef liver snacks, and lunch, we shared a banana and she got some peanut butter on it while we waited for the team to carry her inside for the IV. I was asked about cremation (yes), if I wanted the ashes back (yes) and if I wanted a paw print. “Of course I want a paw print! Have you seen those big beautiful things?”
A woman who parked next to us realized what was happening and asked if I was alone. I said, “yes, it’s okay though.” She offered to stay with us and though I declined, I was incredibly grateful for the offer kindness from a complete stranger.
I brought Dottie’s elevated bed we could both be on together and I set it up outside in the back of the hospital. I held her and just kept saying, “I love you.”
I didn’t post anything immediately because I still feel her here. I giggled when I got in the car to go home just after because I felt her in the back seat waiting for me.
I thought maybe to post when I picked up the ashes but after receiving beautiful flowers from my MCT family this week and opening cards in the mail today from a few of the people who knew, I decided to write this now.
Dottie and I had exactly 21 months together; a time not short nor long because we were grateful for every day.
Dottie had been through so many challenges before we found each other, it’s amazing she had such an endless capacity for love. She is one of the most resilient spirits I’ve ever encountered and repeatedly reminded me that with love and the absence of limitations, miracles are possible every day.
Before we found each other, she had been severely abused, and in our time together, stared significant long-term disabilities and death in the face multiple times. She somehow kept coming back stronger and more loving - an example the potential we all have to shine our bright light no matter the past.
I take great comfort in knowing the work we did with Dr. Palmquist, AHVMF, SCBR, Amal Kadry, Janet Hicks, and Bobiscray will help future beings, live happier and healthier lives.
While it is an adjustment for me, I am at peace because I still feel her at home. It was a “transition”, since “death”, “passing”, or “rainbow bridge” aren’t the right words. I know she’s in heaven but I also believe heaven is all around us if we can recognize all there is to be grateful for.
I share this out of respect for the love she had from so many people. Thank you for sharing in our joy.
The organizations grateful for any donation which support the work we did together are:
AHVMF.org American Holistic Veterinary Medical Foundation
Bobzilla.org @bobiscray
SoCalBulldogRescue.org Southern California Bulldog Rescue” - D. Anderberg
